Friday, February 25, 2011

Ch-ch-ch-changes

Today's scripture (I read Philipians last night 'cause I couldn't sleep):

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." - Phi 4:6

I was up until almost 2 with various anxieties and such, and it wasn't until I prayed that I felt better.  It's very easy for me to forget to go to Him with my concerns and worries and to put them in His capable hands.  The temptation is to take it all on myself and that's clearly something that's not working. At all.

This last year has been one of big changes for us.  Moving up to Seattle, changing jobs, etc. and through it all, we felt called to come up here.   We still haven't gotten sight of his plan for us, but we're getting interesting glimpses.  I suspect that still more change is on the (near) horizon.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

3:am

(repost from facebook 8/14/10)

In odd, quiet moments, I've found myself thinking about the nature of my faith. Sometimes the thoughts come in the morning when I'm getting ready for work, and the house is quiet, and even the dogs are still asleep. Sometimes it's while I'm driving around town, Mt. Ranier is out and floating on the clouds and shining like a beacon. And sometimes it's late at night when I can't sleep, and I'm sitting in a dark house at 3:am trying to figure out what I did wrong. Again.


I think that for me, Faith is about thankfulness and gratitude. It's odd, but I feel it most strongly when I forget about myself or lose myself. Seems a bit backwards. I'd have thought that I'd be most thankful when something great happens to ME, but really, when I lose myself in something I'm doing and it results in a blessing for someone else, I'm not only thankful for the blessing in their life, but thankful that in giving that blessing, I've been blessed unknowingly and unasked for.

When it happens, when the blessing comes without expectation or thought, it's like unwrapping a tiny present that you found on the bedside stand in the morning. Unlooked for, unasked for, but there is such a joy and wonder in receiving that gift, that it takes your breath away. It reminds me of christmas mornings, or when I'm walking along and Beth puts her hand in mine. I crave that feeling deep in my soul. That thankfulness for the unexpected gift. It's such a human thing.

I try to live a life of thankfulness and gratitude. I fail it it most of the time, but when I remember to be thankful, I often feel such a love for Him well up in me that I can hardly breathe. It's much the same feeling that I get when I find myself watching Beth grow into a beautiful, smart young woman, or when I'm with Josh and he suprises and amazes me, and I find myself incredibly proud of him. It's also the same feeling I get when it's 3:am, and Robin's sitting quietly with me just making it better by being there. It's when I get that feeling that I feel the most faith.

Shake your Amazing Grace!

Reposted from Facebook (10/20/10)
So, I was sitting in traffic (Hello LA!) on the way to the airport, and trying to listen to Fish FM (95.9), a christian radio station. The north valley is the far edge of their coverage so it was kinda fading out and another (classic disco?) station was fading in... Here's what I heard:

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me,
(Shake your groove thing, shake your groove thing, ya ya!)
Was blind but now I see.

T'was Grace that taught my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved
(Shake your groove thing!)
How precious did that Grace appear
The hour I first believed.

(Shake your groove thing, ya ya! Show 'em how you do it yall!)

When we've been there ten thousand years,
bright shining as the sun,
(Shake your groove thing, shake your groove thing, ya ya!)
We've no less days to sing God's praise
Than when we'd first begun...

(Shake your groove thing, ya ya)

Somehow, it fit!

Amazing grace can be a somber-sounding song, but for me, it's really about joy and abandon. Joy for the amazing grace of God, and abandon and surrender to his will. Shaking your groove thing in between made me laugh and it really amped up the joy!

Amazing Grace indeed.

Pheonix

I'm resurrecting this site, (not that anyone reads it!) and should be posting more...